Saturday, August 06, 2005 ;
8/06/2005 02:07:00 AM
YAWNZZ... guess I haven't been blogging much recently and I feel that I'm in the mood to do some serious blogging..(even though there is a floorball tournment tmr morning...=P)
I had been quite moody recently after the gathering with the marists guys cause everybody seems to have a plan of what they want to do.. I sort of have a plan as well but this plan is only for myself and it does not include a possible person in my life.. which sort of pose a dilemma for me.... so should I just remain a SINGLES player or a mixed DOUBLES player?
My plan of a SINGLES player is actually quite simple... Get a job after my degree, make careful and smart investments that will get me additional income with minimal effort, support my family and hopefully by 40, I will be rich enough to buy Cosy Bay or one of the condos at Pebble Bay without having to affect my daily lifestyle...
But this might be quite disrupted if there is an extra player... I mean my focus may have to be a bit skewed that way.. (It may sound as a lame excuse but to me, it is a big issue)
Besides that, I have been informed that I've been out for quite some time since I started looking for a mixed DOUBLES partner... the most recent one is in 2003... Look how time flies... so now comes the same question.. should I just remain as a SINGLES player or become a mixed DOUBLES player?
Hahaha.. but this is so lame right??? why would one be so frustrated with a issue that is supposed to happen so naturally in everybody's life? But sadly this is not the case because it takes 2 rackets to form a team and if one side does not intiate his interest, the chance of a new mixed DOUBLES team forming is close to zero....so what should one do when he has entirely lost faith in his confidence in being able to go after one that he has interest in forming a team with? Would it end up the same as it has back then?
If this is going to be the same ending as the previous time, I would rather be a SINGLES player.. why cause so much trouble of finding a partner to play mixed DOUBLES?
Then again, you will never know if you don't try... you might get lucky. To me, that's true in some sense however I have a knack for choosing the wrong partners and get rejected for the stupidest reason...
Example:
1. The target partner is a women DOUBLES player.
2. The target partner already has a mixed DOUBLES partner doesn't made know clearly about it as she is uncertain if that partnership will work out.
3. The target partner is ALREADY a mixed DOUBLES player.
4. The target partner has a verbal agreement to join you and completely forgets about it.
and the possible list go on....
WTF...!! I dun deserve this... I may not be the best SINGLES player around but I dun think I am that bad until I deserved to get thrown around like some plastic bag that can be recycled over and over again.. SHouldn't I deserve better? I should just F**ked it and lead my own sweet life, doing everything for myself only and most prob just feel a bit lonesome during certain festive days of the year....
I am really contradicting myself..... ARGHH...
think I am just tired.. I am going to get some shut eye and recollect my thoughts.. as you can see from what I've typed.. my thoughts are just so random and messed up.....
KEv
Feelings: Messed up
Listening to CORRIENE MAY
J'amore mon cherie
